Lately, I've been considering a big change in my career. I'm thinking of leaving my current job at the marine fisheries lab in lieu of something more suited for my field (molecular biology): good 'ole bench work. I've had a few interviews in laboratories that I really like, and I'm thinking (hoping) I will get an offer from at least one of these places. At both prospective labs, I would be setting up experiments and putting my laboratory skills into play!!
At my current job, I am mostly sitting in front of a computer doing data entry and budget tracking, with the exception of occasionally running the mercury analyzer, which has been few and far between lately..... I was hoping that a benchwork position would open up at my current job, but it looks like only primarily field positions will happen in the near future.... Let me explain the field positions - they require that you go out on the boat a minimum of two days a week, sometimes three, for very grueling days which includes helping pull in a 500 square ft net with lots of fish and seagrass in it. These nets are butt-heavy and some members of our lab have shoulder injuries and a rib injury from pulling these suckers. It is construction-type work more suited for 20-somethings!!
So, my concern, of course, is the prospect of adoption. Since I have no idea WHEN this will happen, I've been engaged in a lot of "what-if" inner dialogue. It goes something like this:
"What-if you take a new position and then the adoption happens a month later?... Will it be easy to take maternity leave ??... And, will I be able to find a day-care on such short notice??..... And, will it be easy to juggle a fairly new job with a tiny baby??..." The questions goes on and on.
You see, I've already made a lot of sacrifices career-wise for my currently non-existent baby:
- I left an awesome job because the commute was too hefty to juggle along with infertility treatments.
- I replaced this awesome job with another cool job with a small commute, which I eventually left due to a devastating miscarriage and in hopes that putting all my energy into treatments would increase our chances of success.
- Next, I partly took this job in the marine fisheries lab in hopes that the adoption would go through quickly and I would have an easy part-time job to balance out new motherhood.
We can all see how well these plans have worked out so far. I'm very jealous of women that haven't made such huge career sacrifices and have children to boot!! Actually, I'm just jealous of women who have children at this point, or a cool carreer! So, I guess I should just focus on my career for now and stop planning so much. Plans, schmans....who needs them anyway??
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7 comments:
I can totally relate. I sacrficed so much for a pregnancy that never happened - including a trip to Paris! I wish I could offer you some good advice, but you can only make the best decisions you can based on the knowledge you have right now. Sorry that was no help...maybe I can send you chocolate?
Hi Chelsi,
Thank you for your post on my blog. I wanted to ask about the nursery actually. You set yours up already? I would love to do that but my husband thinks we should wait until we have the baby and only get a car seat, bassinet, and changing table. What are your thoughts?
Yeah, more of the collateral damage that comes with IF.
I've stared at many blank faces as I've tried to explain to Fertile Friends that any career aspirations I've had have been put on hold - blank stare. Ha! They think it's a choice!
I'm waiting to have a baby so I can restart my career.
Here adoptee parents have to take a mandatory 6 months maternity leave - one full-time carer. Not sure if it's the same there?
I don't think it's a coincidence that we abbreviate infertility with IF- because it's the word we say most often. "If."
I hope you get a job offer and that you do take the plunge. I'm pretty sure maternity leave isn't optional for a company. And you'll work things out with a day care.
We've got to believe it will all work out in the end and we don't have to sacrifice our whole lives for it to happen.
Well, you what they say about "best laid plans".... actually, I'm not sure what the heck they say but nothing ever works according to the neat & tidy plans I have running around in my head!!
Good luck in the decision. It's never easy.
I can relate to this. I took a bit of a lame job 6 years ago (yikes has it been that long!) At the time it made all the sense in the world. I was going to be married and start a family soon and then the lame job would be perfect because I could have lots of flexibility and work from home. Then we were infertile and the job was still a good thing because it allowed me to get to all those appointments. Now we are moving towards adoption and it's still a good job in terms of flexibility. I'll bea able to drop everything and run when we finally get "that" call.
But I also realize I've wasted 6 years in a lame job just hoping to be a mom.
Not to mention all the vacations or fun things that we did not do "just in case" we were pregnant in the beginning and then later it was because we had no money to spare for all the doctor's bills, etc.
I just hope all of our sacrifices are worth it in the end!
Good Luck whatever way you go with this.
Chelsi.... you still around? Just checking in to see how you're doing.
Hugs!
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